Tag Archives: Savior

A Route for Love to Travel

“Corrie,” he began instead, “do you know what hurts so very much? It’s love. Love is the strongest force in the world, and when it is blocked that means pain. “There are two things we can do when this happens. We can kill the love so that it stops hurting. But then of course part of us dies, too. Or, Corrie, we can ask God to open up another route for that love to travel. “God loves Karel—even more than you do—and if you ask Him, He will give you His love for this man, a love nothing can prevent, nothing destroy. Whenever we cannot love in the old, human way, Corrie, God can give us the perfect way.”

I did not know, as I listened to Father’s footsteps winding back down the stairs, that he had given me more than the key to this hard moment. I did not know that he had put into my hands the secret that would open far darker rooms than this—places where there was not, on a human level, anything to love at all. I was still in kindergarten in these matters of love. My task just then was to give up my feeling for Karel without giving up the joy and wonder that had grown with it. And so, that very hour, lying there on my bed, I whispered the enormous prayer:

“Lord, I give to You the way I feel about Karel, my thoughts about our future—oh, You know! Everything! Give me Your way of seeing Karel instead. Help me to love him that way. That much.” And even as I said the words I fell asleep.

Boom, Corrie Ten; Elizabeth Sherrill; John Sherrill (2006-01-01). The Hiding Place (p. 61). Baker Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.

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“On the eve of his people’s horrifying destruction, Mormon fully realizes that there is no hope of his people turning back to God—yet still, he loves them “according to the love of God which was in me, with all my heart… nevertheless… without faith” (Mormon 3:12 and 5:2). And such is how God loves. In Enoch’s glimpse of God weeping, Enoch sees God love in naked vulnerability. It is love in the face of absolute loss. Love that bows to the agency of the Other, but does not break; rather, it draws. God the Father weeps out of love for his children and unfathomable pain at their suffering, and Christ the Son’s vulnerable, broken body lifted up on the cross has the power to “draw all men” unto himself —but not the guarantee ( 3 Nephi 27:14-15).”  Mormonism and the Dilemma of Tragedy

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Day 574

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Thank you Jesus for making each day new.  Thank you for my restoration, a work in progress.  Thank you for thinking me worthy of such sacrifice and dedication.  Thank you for teaching me to wait upon You.

Heavenly Father, thank You for Your Son.  Thank you for giving Him to the world,  for my brother and my sister.  For my mom and my dad.  For the stranger and the friend. For me.  Even me.  Thank You for letting me experience the low so I can more fully experience Your grace lifting me high.

Thank You for never giving up on me  or abandoning me in my weakness.  Thank You for your continual forgiveness when I repeat the same mistake over and over and over.

Thank you for the priesthood in my life.  For men who strive to be worthy to use it.  For blessings and listening ears.  For council and concern.  For encouragement and speaking truth.

Thank You for hugs and positive human contact.  Thank you for BROTHERHOOD and my sweet sisters.  My sisters save my life.  Thank you for caring words and open hearts that invite me in and keep me warm.

Thank you for your promises.  I am desperately striving to hang on to them and actively choosing to trust You and Your Son.

Your Son.  My Brother.  Oh how I love Him.

Thank you for the calm in the middle of my storm today.  Thank you for the peace that settled over my mind and body.  Thank you for honoring my fast that I broke early because it was the right choice for me.  Thank you for the naps.  Thank you for the  summer air that was fresh and not too hot today.  Thank you for the beautiful place in which I live.

I want to be close to You.  Always.  That is what I want.  I want to be like You.  To live like You.  To love like You.  To trust and care and give like You do.

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My Everything

IMG_1154Dress: Anthro Last Summer/Shoes: Nine West/Glasses: Express/Boy: Best Friend

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Here I am wearing the dress over a swimsuit.  In the picture with me is my mission daughter.  Love her.  

So today I was thinking.  A lot.  I did a lot of thinking today.  Awhile back I watched this TED talk on why veterans (it just took me three times to spell ‘veteran’ correctly) miss war.   Very interesting and totally believable/understandable.  What it came down to was BROTHERHOOD.  While watching the video my emotions were sitting in my throat.  You know that choking feeling? There are a million reasons to cry and a million reasons not to.

My message to HWMNBN, I will be your brotherhood (family), I will love you.  I will have your back. I am not perfect but I am trustworthy.  I will do whatever it takes for you, as long as it is right and true.  I love you.  Let me be your brotherhood.  

So today I was thinking about  BROTHERHOOD and what my closet experiences with it that might relate in some small way to service men and women.  And I came up with nothing,  Nothing could ever compare.  But then I really thought.  Lately I have been going through some serious s***.  We all go through it.  And almost on a daily basis for months now I have AT LEAST one moment where I feel like I cannot go on.  Like there is no way out.  It is life or death. And in these moments there is one person who is right there with me.  Fighting for MY VERY LIFE.  And this person is Jesus the Christ.  HE is my BROTHERHOOD.   In those moments there seems to be only two outcomes: death or Christ.  My Brother literally is my Savior.  JESUS CHRIST is my brotherhood.

And maybe someday HWMNBN will let me be too.

But if there is never anyone else that will be ok because of  THIS.

Thank you Jesus for being my brotherhood.  My EVERYTHING.

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